The company is a microcosm made up of postures and communication, demanding in terms of relationships. Leader, manager, employee... we all need to master our speaking in order to establish our legitimacy and gain the trust of our employees as well as their members.if we.
Knowing how to speak and assert your ideas while remaining open is an art. Lecture, presentation, interview, sale... all verbal exchange situations require mastery of this skill. Complex and often subtle, speaking out is the ultimate asset for peaceful and constructive professional relationships.
But, rest assured: it is not innate, it can be learned and worked on!
Between naturalness, strategy and improvisation, it requires know-how as well as interpersonal skills which are necessary to ensure a certain legitimacy, even authority, among your colleagues. Grégoire Tournon, communications expert, reveals the essential points of vigilance for successful assertive speaking.
Speaking: a question of conviction
A good speaker is a speaker who is convinced of what he says or announces. The first principle to apply to succeed in your speech is therefore to be firm in your convictions while being flexible in form. Indeed, it cannot be a question of imposing an opinion, but rather of sharing an idea. You have to be convinced yourself to be convincing. If you don't believe in your message, it might show!
Be assertive
Speaking out is never one-sided. And this, even in the context of a speech, contrary to what one might believe. On the one hand, because any speech involves taking the audience into account. On the other hand, because this audience has a right of reply. From then on, the objective is to express your point of view while respecting others. You must also take the audience into consideration: it is they who must be “transformed” after your intervention.
And that’s the whole principle of assertiveness: be clear in your message, firm in your positions while not forgetting that the audience has their place. Through his posture, his gestures, ... the speaker shows that he is open and attentive, ready to understand the point of view of others, even in the case of protesting words. Indeed, the objective is not to impose a point of view, but ultimately to find a common solution and to reassure.
Some key principles
So, for assertive speech, you must have a few simple practices in mind:
- Distribute your gaze to the entire audience or interlocutors
- Pay attention to the paraverbal and non-verbal (gestures, voice, position, etc.)
- Practice active listening
- Separate facts from opinions
Beforehand, don’t hesitate to rehearse and film yourself.
As a general rule, assertive speaking goes well if you show empathy for your audience and if you do not ignore a possible intervention from someone in the audience. What you must avoid above all is losing the thread of your message. You should therefore respond briefly immediately or take note of the comment and come back to it at the appropriate time. To summarize: you listen, you understand, you take note, but you continue.
But the best thing is still to indicate the rules at the beginning of your intervention: “If you have any questions, I will answer them at the end”.
Structuring your speech
You now have the keys to adopting a legitimate speaker posture. To preserve this legitimacy, do not let yourself be destabilized.
The more you work on your speaking, the less interventions, objections and other hazards will disturb you. It is therefore essential to structure your message as well as your speaking time in order to distribute roles (who speaks and when) and obtain support from your audience.
Steps :
- A hook to pique the audience's interest
- A reminder of what leads to speaking out
- A summary of the different parts of your intervention
- Some examples of objections to anticipate and temper those of the less convinced
- Arguments that support your message
- Examples that resonate with your audience
- A reformulation to clarify
- A conclusion to make an impression
The audience's place
The audience's voice is necessary to advance ideas or to make them adhere to the message. However, you must remain the leader in your speaking: it is up to you to indicate the times for discussions. Either the audience can intervene as it happens (this requires you to be very well prepared), or at the end. The second solution has several advantages:
- No destabilization while you speak
- You remain in control of the game throughout the exercise
- You have the possibility of integrating certain responses to frequent objections when you speak
Training: Succeed in an effective presentation
Speaking: understanding the environment to master the game
Speaking that works is speaking that leaves room for interactions. This is what we talk about improvisation. And for controlled improvisation, you must work on two elements over which you will not have control: spontaneous interventions and the environment.
Taking your audience into consideration is more than just looking at them or talking to them. The audience is the entire environment in which the speech takes place and what constitutes it.
- What interests him?
- Why are the participants here, what do they want to learn?
- In what setting does the event take place?
- Where does the speaking take place?
Armed with these elements, you can then modulate your message and avoid monologue. The stories and asides that you integrate depending on the audience are like a game that makes your speaking more spontaneous. This gives more authenticity to your speech and therefore more legitimacy.
Interventions: controlled improvisation
You have distributed the roles and speaking times: you are the master of the game. However, you are not a soothsayer and do not control everything about an intervention. The important thing is to interact while keeping the thread of your message.
Two principles to remember:
1/ Never deny others
Indeed, take the speaker into account and respond to them. For example: “I understand what you are saying, but I don’t agree. Can we talk about it later? » or simply “We’ll come back to this a little later”. In other words, never close the door to discussion, especially not in the event of a contradiction.
2/ Do not experience objections as personal attacks
Furthermore, you must become aware of the emotions that the intervention generates without overreacting.
With a few simple reflexes, it is always possible to maintain control over your speaking, despite objections (anticipated or not).
Examples:
- Take a deep breath and take your time before responding
- Allow the interlocutor to reach the end of their objection without interrupting them
- To look at it
- Respond to him with retort (humor, counterattack, irony, derision, etc.)
- Answer “I’ll find out” rather than “I don’t know”
Responding to Objections
Preparing your speech also means preparing counter-arguments to the objections you expect. In other words, the most frequently encountered points of view and other annoying questions. This is a special case of intervention because, if it happens to be in good faith, the objection can also be a pure attempt at destabilization. And since we must never allow ourselves to be destabilized or ignore an objection, we must therefore deconstruct it.
Deconstruct an objection in three steps:
1/ Ask for details
This is useful for unmasking imposture or malice, or even for testing the bad faith of the objector: “What do you mean? », “Why is this a problem? »…
2/ Rephrase to make sure you understand correctly
“If I understood correctly…”, “To summarize…”.
3/ Look for confirmation
“Are we in agreement?” »
You absolutely must stop this objection process or you risk losing the thread. However, the objection, like the simple question, must be emphasized. So either respond right away if you have the answer, or end it diplomatically (“noted, but I disagree”) and move on. In this way, debate does not have time or space to arise.
In other words, mastering your speech means knowing how to adapt to your environment. To gain legitimacy or ensure it, juggle the mechanisms of improvisation, repartee as well as the collection of information on the environment of your speaking. Legitimacy is the first step towards getting others to support your ideas!
